I was having an interesting conversation with a group of women on the topic of community support and activism for various causes. I found it alarming that many if not most of these women had the self-sacrificing mentality of community support at all costs, even personal expense. I was even called selfish for promoting the concept of self-care ahead of community care.
Why is it so hard for us to raise generations of women who understand that you cannot give others anything to drink from a dry empty well? I cannot give the community what I do not have for myself. I cannot be an activist for any cause when I am disenfranchised. I cannot help you if I am not safe. We need firm footing prior to providing any assistance to the downtrodden. Is it normal for activists to commit suicide? While it’s uncommon, it does happen. Those who do aren’t in a good place should step back and regroup before attempting to give to any cause or anyone.
Making you your first priority is not a selfish act. It’s the natural order of things. While society tells us otherwise, our first responsibility really is self-care. Strong communities are built on good deeds that form like ripples. They start in small inner circles and expand outward. Happy individuals with fulfilled lives raising solid families are who the ones who build strong communities. Not depleted people who keep giving selflessly to draining causes.
So if you’re part of a community that does not benefit you, step back, divest and regroup. It’s not selfish to take care of yourself. Question the motives of anyone who says otherwise.